dual*ities

tweak (v.) 1. To pinch, pluck, or twist sharply; 2. To adjust; fine-tune; 3. To make fun of; tease.

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Quali to Quanti

Tweaking is not a word that I would normally use…not even after it had become such a “fashionable” term to throw around, thanks to the exposure it got through the movie You’ve Got Mail. But if I were to capture what I had been doing these past couple of days with one word, tweaking would be it. The object of my tweak-iness? My thesis data. (Big surprise there.)

The long and short of it is that my adviser, who I met with last Friday (after not having seen her for four months), urged me to incorporate quantitative methods of analysis into my research, which happens to be qualitative/phenomenological in nature. Apparently, on a recent dissertation defense, one PhD student’s qualitative study was not received so well by the members of her panel. My adviser, thus, hypothesized that the Philippines is not yet entirely ready for theory-building researches using the bottom-up approach. Which leaves me with no choice but to, well, tweak my voluminous qualitative data some more so that I could convert it into quantitative stuff that I could test for statistically. Which means that I would have to postpone finalizing my manuscript a few more weeks, instead of submitting it next week as originally planned. Arrgh!

To allow time for the adjustments, my adviser suggested that I target September 20 as my thesis defense date. But…but…that’s two more months from now! No can do for me. I mean, I do like my thesis topic. It is, after all, about the concept of helping—a subject that is close to my heart. But I’d really like it much better if I could go beyond just researching and writing about helping and get back to actually doing it.

Well, I told myself I'd defend by August. So by hook or by crook, I will defend by August, even if that means continuing on being sleep-deprived for the next 3 weeks or so. Not that I ever was not. Harhar.

Jeers and Leers

But that was not all the tweaking that I witnessed these past few days. Yesterday (Sunday), I attended my first UAAP game this season. It was ADMU vs. NU, at the Loyola Gym. It’s hardly a match that Ateneans would opt to go to (no offense to NU students and fans), but I decided to go anyway, if only to release all the thesis-related nervous energy building up inside me since Friday afternoon. After all, my mind can take only so much data-tweaking for one day. But when I got there, I almost immediately got sucked into the highly-charged atmosphere of the game. The brand of play was extremely physical, and hotter heads, more of often than not, prevailed, both on and off the court (later on, causing 2 players to get thrown off the game). Jeers and leers came in loads. Now that’s tweaking for you, in the worst sense of the word. Like Reg said, there was definitely a “weird” feeling to that particular game, which was reminiscent of the riotous UP vs. ADMU match last year where Larry Fonacier sustained his season-ending injury. Thankfully, nobody got injured this time (not in a critical manner anyway). But still, I didn’t appreciate the hot heads. Really uncalled for. I just wanted to say, “Chill guys, it’s just a game—one which our team is leading by 30 points, by the way!”

On the brighter side, ADMU did win by a large margin. And I’m not sure when I’m gonna witness such a big victory again this season. So yeah, that got me considerably cheered up, despite having to go back to more data tweaking for the rest of the day.:)

Up Close and Personal

Fast forward to this afternoon. So, in between my thesis tweaking, I agreed to meet up with D, a Pathways volunteer who asked to interview me for his English class project. The interview, he said, would revolve around my experiences as a volunteer, which is a topic I am most comfortable with. After all, I must have talked about that particular subject like 48 million times already. So, no sweat. I’m game.

And so the interview started just like any other. I was asked the usual questions: What made you pursue a life of volunteerism? What were the organizations that you volunteered for? What was your most memorable experience as a volunteer? And so on, and so forth.

And then, midway into the interview, D asked: Why didn’t you have a romantic relationship through all those years? Do you think that having a boyfriend is a hindrance to volunteerism? Followed by: Did anyone try courting you? What was your response? Mwahaha! That really cracked me up. Not that I was unwilling to answer the questions. They were actually “refreshing,” if you think about it. It’s just that they weren’t the usual questions that I get asked about when I’m talking about volunteerism. Hehehe. And then I realized…my, my, I’ve been tweaked! This is what I get for agreeing to be interviewed by someone who knows about my “singleness” thrust. Haha. And for that, I give D points for creativity and inquisitiveness.:) (And maybe, someday, when I have the time and inclination, I’ll remember to post my answers to his questions on this blog. Hehehe.)

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I got home this afternoon just in time for PGMA’s State of the Nation Address. Nothing she said was really new to me. They were mostly motherhood statements. But then again, I expected that somehow. And yes, she seemed to have excited most of the congressmen and LGU officials with the “parliamentary/federal government” proposal, but at the end of the day, the real issues were not really addressed. I would love to tweak her statements and proposals, but right now, my mind is tired enough as it is. So I’ll just save that for another day. For now, I shall reserve my energies for something I have control over, such as my thesis.

And so, the tweaking continues...